Summer is coming to a close and September is already upon us. I have heard friends and acquaintances say that they are too busy with work to even take a summer vacation or break. Lose or use leave piles up and they continue to work late into the night and on the weekends. It seems we are so indespensable that no one else can do the job we do. Employers and even we forget the value of taking time to make time for ourselves. But how do we give our brains a break to process our lives or just to quiet our minds? Yoga class, meditation and nature walks on the weekends help, but then it's right back into the daily grind of everyday life.
I feel that vacation away from our usual routines is an essential part of becoming a healthy person. Lately I have had an upheaval in my own life. My ninety three year old Mom passed away on July 27. Suddenly, in my bereaved state, I was thrust into action mode to go to the funeral home, pick a casket, compose and deliver a eulogy, attend the funeral, shovel dirt on my mother's casket, and entertain people for three straight days in the home my mom inhabited just two days before, without her being there! Talk about an emotionally daunting and stressful situation. To add insult to injury I have had to clear out her home and to deal with harried siblings about difficult, contrary matters. At the same time I have continued to run a busy Macrobiotic cooking business, held pot lucks and the Macrobiotic Boot Camp, dealt with a sick cat, lead my book club and tried to eat healthy meals and take nurturing walks to calm my mind. I did it all regardless of the feelings of sadness, guilt, and finally anger that have consumed me.
How does a person clear her head of all this clutter while in the thick of it? I decided to create a space to breathe in the form of a room by the sea. Here I hoped to just sweep out the cobwebs and to take a break from the constant barrage of troubling emails relating to Mom's estate, the phone calls from people needing something from me, and the monkey mind thoughts that were agitating my brain.
After just one day at the ocean, I have been able to get back to my true self. I have thought about what kind of person I am and about the things that are truly important to me. I have reflected on staying non reactive in charged situations when others try to trigger me to react and that we have power over how and when we do respond. I have thought about how I need to recognize the things over which I have power and the blessings for which I am grateful. Other thoughts have been about what I need to do to stay centered and healthy in my mind and body and which people in my life complement my well being. If I had not taken the time to make time to separate myself from the patterns of my daily life, I do not think I would have been successful bringing clarity to these life challenges facing me now. I had to take time to make time for me.
In addition, my son has been hanging out with me here and our discussions have been animated. I treasure my relationship with him which has had its up and down moments in the past. Now we can be frank and forthright with each other and it is refreshing to share an honest relationship with him. Our chats here have covered boundary setting, determining one's direction, life patterns that don't serve us anymore, and being in the moment to pay attention to what is right in front of you. How fascinating and wonderful to take time to make time to work these important issues out with your child and to give them the gift of your undivided attention and time. My twenty three year old daughter and her boyfriend spent some time with us as well. We frolicked in the waves together and shared some meals while they were here. We took time to make time for each other even though they have their own very busy lives with challenging jobs. We all decided it was important to share this meaningful time together.
We need to take the time to take care of ourselves before we reach the breaking point. Just as a disease did not suddenly appear as when someone says, " He was so healthy and he suddenly keeled over.", we don't want to wait until we get to the point where we can't think straight, we are grabbing chocolate or alcohol or "biting everyone's heads off" in anger. Take time to make time for yourself and your loved ones and choose the friends that take time to make time for you. Fall is a lovely time to take time away from your daily life and go to the mountains or shore. It may be the best thing you can do for yourself and you will come back focused on what really matters to you.
Comments are welcomed and would love to hear what you think about this topic or if it resonated with you.
